What fills your heart?

Have you ever felt like you were let down by God? I was reading Genesis recently and, you know, if anyone could have felt let down by God, Abraham certainly could have. He received all these promises of great things and for years there was nothing to show for it. The promises were seemingly unfulfilled. Yet Abraham maintained faith and did not abandon God.

A similar case that came to mind was St. Faustina Kowalska. Jesus called her to found an order and she, despite serious illnesses did everything she could to realize his desire. She died before foundation took place. It looks, again, like a let down, almost like God was messing with her. Yet she, too, stayed strong in the faith until the end. Why?

I would propose that God is greater than his promises. For Abraham and St. Faustina, it was worth much more to have God than to have anything else. They believed and hoped that his promises and desires would be fulfilled, but those things were on a totally secondary level. All those things came after knowing and loving the Lord. With God theirs hearts were content. They were utterly satisfied by their relationship with God. Everything else, had or not had, failed to influenced the happiness and peace they found in God.

There is that interesting Bible passage where Abraham asks God not to destroy the city if there are 40 righteous people in it, then 30, then 20...and he gets down to 5 righteous people. Well, needless to say the city gets destroyed, but have you thought about why God wanted that to happen?

I remember when I was a kid my mom would bring me shopping. Me? Well I was obsessed with Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles- loved the cartoon (early 90's, right?) and needed as many of the action figures as possible. There were all different kinds- the one where the shell opened for storage, the one with the automatic karate chop... Well, I knew that if the shopping was at Target, there would be a chance to get more action figures! The thing was, if I didn't bring it up on the shopping trip, it would not happen because we all know that buying ninja turtles will not be on mom's shopping list. Bottom line: I had to ask.

So I was talking to a recently ordained priest about that passage of the bible and he asked me the very question: why do you think God did that? God already knew what was about to happen. Fr. John told me that God must have wanted to let Abraham know that he needs to be proactive. It reminded  me of something I read in In the School of the Holy Spirit by Fr. Jacques Philippe. He emphasizes how we must ask God to inspire and guide us- we shouldn't just expect it to happen. Ok everybody- lesson learned! Let's start praying.